I’ve been playing my guitar more lately and I’ve even written a few songs. The problem is I hate singing them, and not just because I have a bad voice. They are challenging songs, songs that make you feel uncomfortable and confronted. I hate to sing them and not live them out. I want to live like Keith Green, who would first walk the walk, then sing the song. Have you ever heard his song “Asleep in the Light”? Well you should. It is so challenging and the way he sings it is so raw and passionate, especially if you understand the way he lived his life. I won’t listen to it unless I’m prepared, it’s not one I just let play along with all my other tracks. It is too heart breaking. I don’t want to be like the church he sings about, it scares me too much to think that I am.

Sometimes I get upset at God and wonder why he isn’t doing what He is supposed to, you know moving in powerful ways, spreading his grace and love. In fact the other day I was complaining to God (in form of song actually) and He really spoke clearly to me. I was asking God where He was and why He had abandoned us.  God replied to me by basically saying: Where am I? Inside of you, waiting for you to do something about it. He asked me why, when He has given me the keys I was still sitting there complaining to Him about the door being closed.  I was like, “Oh.” I guess that answered that.  So yes sir, I have discovered the answer to the age old question, “Where is God?”. Turns out He’s been inside of me this whole time.

Point: I have no excuses left. Neither do you. It’s time for action. Time to be a doer not just a hearer. Ready, go.

“The Kingdom of God does not come with your careful observation, nor will people say ‘here it is’ or ‘there it is,’ because the Kingdom of God is within you.” Luke 17:20

Coincidentally tonight was my church’s prayer group and I was able to exhibit the do for a few ladies, one of which asked me what was on top of head. I wouldn’t fully understand  what it felt like to possess such wonderful hair however, until I went grocery shopping. Oh Graham Safeway, so full of familiar faces and teenage boys driving up bumpin country, how are you the epicenter of our strange little town? I knew I was bound to have a run in.

While shopping, I tried to act as nonchalantly as I could, but it felt strange getting either the “prolonged stare”, where I considered reminding the person to close their mouth, or the “quick double-glance”. I’m not really used to that. It made for a lot of awkward “I caught you staring at me” moments, replied by the “no, see, I’m just looking around randomly” look. Even though it’s cool to feel like I’m doing something unique,  I don’t really enjoy people staring at me. After telling my mom this she said, “But isn’t that the point? To get people to notice you?” and the answer is no mom, it is not. The point is to do something I like that is different, to expand my comfort zone,  to embrace my more outgoing side. The side that will be able to reach out to people more. The same point I’m hoping this blog will encourage as well.

I’ve actually had this blog since October of 2007 and wrote about ten posts, my most recent being in March of 2008. Even in it’s glory days though, the most traffic this sad little site ever saw in one day was eight people. January 19, 2008, a day to remember. The last time anyone even looked on here was in March, and that was probably by accident.

My intention with resurrecting this site is to do small things with my life that are worth writing about. I think a faux hawk is straddling that line, but it’s a start. I have this thing I call “My list of life”,  in it are random goals that I hope to complete. One of the things (and possibly the most significant) is my goal to have a life that is worth writing about.  A life that could tell a story worth listening to. One that is full of adventure, drama, romance and maybe even a little sci-fi if I’m lucky. So my logic is this: perhaps if I start writing blogs, or at least create a venue to share stories, I will seek to create  more stories to tell. Or perhaps I’ll just open my eyes to the stories that are already there. I don’t know, maybe I’m mistaken. It’s worth a shot though. If nothing else it will freshen up my writing skills.

So here’s to a new day, a new do and a renewed blog. May many adventures and hairstyles follow.